And another thing

 Dear Jim:

 

Well let me try again. Perhaps your sister (the NUN..true) can get this letter to you with her connections.

 

In answer to my health and general well-being I can report that my deterioration is progressing at an aggressive pace.

 

 My doctor informs me that the extra 10 years of life that I should expect from not smoking, no drinking, lots of exercise, 10 hours nightly sleep and weight control are over.

Congratulations!

 And I’m now on the same life expectancy schedule as the Overweight, heavy smoking, big drinking insomniacs.

 

I find I need to change a few of my habits.

 

 For example, I used to put on my socks standing on one foot and deftly pullng on a sock with both hands.

Lately, I find I tend to lose my balance and careen across the room either falling outright or ploughing into a dresser or whatever.

Now if this continues, I could face serious injury or death.

Imagine an OBIT that says ..” Bill Meder died this morning of blunt force trauma while putting on his socks.”

 Humiliating right?

 

I am having problems with my memory. Not losing it. Just the opposite. Digital quality recall of everything back to 4 years old. This is a painful and depressing  problem.

 

I remember clearly playing squash every day and sometimes twice for 45 minutes each game. I tried to warm up in a court a while ago and after the warmup I went straight home for a snooze.

 

I remember riding my bike for one hour after work around the end of the island. Seldom missed a day. I just sold my bike because I kept falling off sideways when my feet got stuck in the pedals. Ouch.

 

I remember when I could carry my golf bag for 18 holes. Now I need help lifting the bag on to the cart.

 

I remember loving to ski for hours even when it was minus 25F. I can’t go skiing anymore because I’m afraid of getting my nose cold.

 

I remember quite fondly the frosty martini glass with the twist of lemon moving across the room towards me. Now it’s “will that be flat or sparkling”. Terrible, no?

 

I remember hitting from the white tees, looking longingly at the blues.

Now I hit from the red tees looking longingly at the Ladies yellow tees. Brutal.

 

I used to drive at high speed, steering with my knee while I typed a lengthy text.

I now drive very slow with both hands tightly gripping the wheel praying that I won’t blow by a stop sign or red light and kill myself or someone else.

I will probably stop driving either by losing my licence or death. It’s 50/50

 

I could go on, but you get it.

 

Running, jumping, bobbing, weaving, twisting, twirling, leaping, agile, fast, quick, alert, motor skills etc. etc. can nevermore be used in a sentence that begins with Bill. Depressing right?

 

Now I’m not complaining. Just reporting. In the future I will write to you about all the things I’m still good at if anything comes to mind.