October 16, 2011
Dear Jim: Last Saturday's wedding note to the Schwarz clan.
Dear Gaston and Matte:
I woke up this morning after last night’s wedding party feeling depressed. As I try to get my big toe in to the trigger guard I thought I would share a few thoughts with you. As I looked across the room at all the beautiful people I realized that this used to be us! Then I looked around my table and thought, no, no this can’t be how it ends. (Possibly a life threatening thought...don't tell anyone I said it). What a crowd! If it wasn’t for the drooling and leering from my age group the picture would have been perfect.
I must say the Windsor is the best venue in Montreal, hands down. Elegant and sophisticated. Now that the Schwarz clan is complete I suspect we have seen our last party there. I feel sorry for the next parents who need to hold a wedding. You have all set the bar so high that eloping is the only option. I think of my daughter’s wedding in Barbados on the beach with just our family and a few drug dealers as observers and am thrilled that I dodged one bullet. When my son gets married, if I’m still alive, I’m going to have to suggest Bora Bora in August with just the two of them and ask that they take a lot of pictures.
The food was fabulous. I would describe the menu as Lots and More. It was superb and the service was exceptional also. The wine couldn’t have been better and as you know I don’t drink. I did consider backing up the SUV and loading a few cases for my wine cellar but I thought the staff might notice and think I was interfering with their plans. It was difficult enough getting all those flowers in to the car with the rain coming down so hard.
I’m not a dancer but I did go to the floor to see that gang throw Nikole in to the air. I tried to get in on catching her but with my back and the under 40 bunch in front of me I backed off. The band was great and when my ears stop ringing sometime next week I’m going to find out who they were so I can recommend them. The two 80+ year olds dancing up a storm when I left really put me off. I looked for a stretcher or ambulance waiting outside but they were well hidden. There is no way they survived the nite.
Funny, I didn’t talk to Matte all night. I did follow her around hoping that her bracelet might fall off and I would be able to buy a new Porsche Panamera (Turbo) and maybe a Cayenne for the winter with the change. (I know that this idea doesn’t seem very nice and in fact I would have returned it for the reward and bought a Prius instead.)
Nikole and Karl were smashing and the speeches were the highlight. 90 seconds from the father of the bride is just about right and both of your sons spoke brilliantly. Really, it was the best I’ve seen.
So the perfect family, the perfect spouses, the fabulous careers, the perfect holidays and everyone fit and beautiful. You do understand how we can all agree to hate you!
Thank you so much for including us. It was the best and it was so much fun seeing so many of our friends and having the opportunity to get caught up. You both have done such a wonderful job with your family and watching them and their friends celebrate this event was a real treat.
Bill and Sally Meder
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